


Whatever It Takes to Keep You Safe

by kainess



Series: Obey Me! One Shots [9]
Category: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!
Genre: Angst, Blood and Injury, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Lucifer - Freeform, M/M, MC - Freeform, Main character - Freeform, Major character death - Freeform, SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER, and what would have happened if simeon didn't show up when he did, blood mention, do not read if you do not want to be spoiled on lesson 38 and forward, don't get mad at me for spoilers i warned ya lmao, if you are like me and don't care about spoilers then please go ahead and read, obey me - Freeform, obey me shall we date - Freeform, shall we date - Freeform, this is basically my take on lesson 38
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:41:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,512
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27719702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kainess/pseuds/kainess
Summary: You feel so dissociated from it; as if you were simply watching someone else’s end. You will not last the night.OrWhat if Simeon didn’t get to you and Lucifer in time?
Relationships: Lucifer (Shall We Date?: Obey Me!)/Reader
Series: Obey Me! One Shots [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1779661
Comments: 8
Kudos: 66





	Whatever It Takes to Keep You Safe

**Author's Note:**

> SPOILERS for the later lessons, I believe lesson 38 and onwards. You know the scene,,, the scene that had all of us collectively shit ourselves and cry lmao

TW: mentions of death, blood, and injury due to stabbing. :)

You always had the best intentions, but you can’t save everyone and you knew that. In fact, you’d be lying to yourself if you said you didn’t know you’d eventually be put in this situation. Your unwavering loyalty has cost you to lose yourself time and time again, but maybe this time you’ve truly crossed a line that cannot be uncrossed. The taste of copper in your mouth is an ever-so-present reminder of that. 

Lucifer never wanted to get close to you and this was something you knew from the start. His pride would never let him admit it, but he cared for you deeply, more so than he’s cared for anything else. Still, over time you managed to break and tear his walls down, seeing glimpses of Lucifer that others couldn’t even begin to imagine. You enjoyed his company and you knew he enjoyed yours equally, if not more. You knew that scared him. 

Do you think he’ll forgive you for this? Will he think of you fondly in the future, or will you have left a bitter taste in his mouth? The thought makes your heart ache. 

You feel your body being propped up, strong arms secured around you tightly. You felt safe, despite the fact that you were oozing blood from your chest. It was warm, just like him. You hear Lucifer call your name with a broken voice, a look of pure disbelief and grief plastered across his face. You felt awful that you were the cause of it, but you knew you had done the right thing, or at least that’s what you chose to believe. “Why did you do this? Why didn’t you kill me instead?” You can see the slight tremble of his lips and the barely concealed tears that are beginning to well in his eyes. Maybe the reality of the situation finally sank in. “You heard what Solomon said earlier. You just needed to kill me to restore the power of the Night Dagger; you didn’t need to stab yourself.”

“Just? You make it sound as if it’s the easiest thing in the world to kill you.” Your voice was a lot fainter than you thought it would be. “I would rather die than kill you with my own hands. Either way I would end up dying.” Your words didn’t comfort him but they weren’t meant to. You were only telling the truth, whether that’s what he wanted to hear or not. “I know you’re suffering from amnesia, but did you really think I would be able to kill you? There is not a thing in this world that could convince me that killing you is the right way. Not a single thing.” 

You felt something warm and wet drop onto your cheek, and suddenly you felt more drops of water landing on your cheek. “Lucifer…” You reached a hand up and cupped his cheek, your thumb caressing the smooth skin. What was there left to say? Nothing you could say would make the situation better and you both knew that. His tears stream down his cheeks as he’s hit with the realization that you were dying, and that nothing he could do would stop this. He knew that as a human you would die before him, but he never thought he would be facing it so suddenly. Not like this. He wanted to see you die of old age in your sleep, a peaceful death that you deserved. If anyone deserved a nice death, it was you. 

“I don’t-- I don’t know what to do.” This was the first time you had seen Lucifer look so beside himself, so _ lost  _ as if he were a child looking for an adult to help. This wasn’t the normal Lucifer you knew, but then again, this wasn’t a normal situation that you knew either. You died once already, though you were brought back and it was significantly more complicated than this. Here, you stabbed yourself. That was all there was to it. You stabbed yourself so that Lucifer could live his life. It really was that simple. 

“Only… only one of us needs to die in order for peace to be restored. It doesn’t have to be you. Besides, I’m just a human anyway. What is so special about me that I should outlive the great and mighty Lucifer?” It was becoming increasingly difficult to speak and you could feel your vision beginning to blur. You felt both as light as a feather and as heavy as a brick at the same time. It was hard to explain; you yourself didn’t even fully understand it. But does anyone truly understand the concept of dying? When  _ you’re _ actively dying? It’s too much for the brain to process. “I think most will agree with me that it should be me and not you.”

“Don’t say that.” You could tell he wanted to be angry with you, to scream at you at the top of his lungs for putting yourself in this situation, for putting  _ him  _ in this situation, and yet-- and yet he just couldn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to hate you or blame you. He was just hurt. “This wasn’t how this was supposed to go.” 

“I know.” Is all you offer the grieving demon. The eldest brings you closer to him, embracing you in his arms as your head rests against his chest. Death didn’t seem as scary as you once thought. If death meant staying in the embrace of Lucifer, then it couldn’t be all that bad, right? “Promise me you won’t… that you won’t blame yourself for this. No one… could have seen this coming.” You were running out of time. 

“Why not just kill me?” His voice was desperate, his eyes wide as you watched him try to process the situation. 

“I always want you safe. I would have done the same for any of your brothers.” You couldn’t waste your breath on speaking any longer, it was taking more out of you than you thought it would. Oh, how you took for granted all the times you were able to speak without feeling so winded. To fully express how you felt without your own body getting in the way of that, acting as a physical barrier.

You feel Lucifer’s grip around you tighten, the demon pressing you closer to his body to convince himself that you’re still there. “I can’t live a world without you.” His voice was so broken and it destroyed you. “I don’t want to;  _ I can’t _ .” 

Your time was coming to an end and fast. You thought you were okay with this, but now you were finding that you didn’t have enough time. “I love you, Lucifer.” You needed him to know. You’ve said it to him hundreds of times, but you  _ needed  _ him to know it at this moment. “I love you so fucking much.” Your own vision is filled with tears and you rapidly blink them away, instead wanting to focus on the demon’s face. You wanted his face to be the last thing you saw. 

“Don’t say that. You aren’t leaving.” You both knew he was in denial as he tugged you closer, his body shaking as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. “You’re not leaving me.” You smile to yourself as you let the sobbing man hold you, his cries filling up the room and no doubt reaching the ears of his brothers. You were sure there would be complete and utter chaos within the next several minutes, but you knew you wouldn’t be there to see it. 

You would miss all the small things about Lucifer, the way his eyebrows would furrow as he filled out his paperwork, or the way he would smile as he texted Mammon when thinking no one was looking. You would miss the fond look in his eyes when bragging about his brothers to Lord Diavolo, and you would miss the way how he always knew exactly what to say when to comfort you. You wish you could do the same for him now. This would just have to be good enough; it had to, this was all you had to offer.

“I love you.” Lucifer cries into your neck. “I love you, I love you, I love you,  _ I love you _ .” He knows he’s chanting those words to an empty room. The demon knew the exact moment your heart gave its final beat, the exact moment you drew your last breath. He felt the difference in your body weight, the moment you became heavier to hold and colder to the touch. He knew it, but he chose to ignore it. For now, just for now, he would pretend that everything was okay, that you were only lying asleep in his arms. 

You gave and gave all your love, but in the end it was never enough to protect those you love, let alone yourself. Sometimes, that’s just how it has to be.

**Author's Note:**

> ayo bet you didn’t expect the girl who writes the shitty second hand embarrassment pick up lines to hit you with angst huh? wELL GUESS WHAT NO ONE IS SAFE.  
> I don’t know about you guys, but when I played that lesson and had the option to stab Lucifer or myself, I opted to stab myself before Simeon swooped in and saved the day. Honestly, I planned on stabbing myself from the get-go because hello??? yeah obvious solution. kILL ME NOT LUCIFER AGSHFD But recently (and by recently i mean like, two hours ago) I’d been thinking, what if Simeon didn’t show up in that split second? What if he showed up only a second later?  
> Since switching to anime/games, I haven’t written angst in a long time, but angst (esp character death) is one of my all time favorite things to read and write. It’s the self torture for me.


End file.
